There’s a trend now (if a sample size of 2 is large enough to establish a trend) that my children arrive before their due date. It isn’t that they necessarily want to, but my blood pressure just doesn’t agree with the end stages of pregnancy and the only cure is delivery. Luckily, I generally felt pretty good for the majority of the time I’m pregnant, though it is much much harder to be a stay-at-home pregnant mom with a toddler than a pregnant lady with no kids commuting to an office job everyday. I am speaking from experience here.

7:00pm Tuesday, September 28th

I take my blood pressure (BP) at home, as I have been monitoring it per doctor’s orders for the past 2 weeks, and it has been creeping up, and finally hit that 140/90 threshold which prompted a call to Triage. The doctor on call recommends induction, so Bill and I prepare to go to the hospital. We have been prepping Kalliszta for her new baby, and told her that Mommy and Daddy won’t be home for the next 3 days because we are going to the hospital to get the baby out. Luckily, my mom, Kalliszta’s Mima, has been staying with us for the past many weeks in part for this specific occasion and will stay with Kalliszta. I take a shower, we eat dinner, and around 11pm Bill and I head to downtown Chicago to Northwestern Prentice Women’s Hospital. At that hour, the drive only took 40 minutes. By midnight we are admitted to triage and I am hooked up to the blood pressure monitor that takes a measurement every 15 minutes, as well as the belly monitors that track contractions and the heartbeat. After 2 hours of good blood pressure readings, averaging about 120/70, and all labs of bloodwork and urine come back clean, I am released to go home. I guess there is something super relaxing about being in a hospital that caused my BP to go down? Bill and I are a little surprised, but also glad to have had this practice run.

11:30am Thursday, September 30th

I am at my 38 week appointment (even though I was only at 37 weeks and 6 days) and again my BPs are up. They teeter near the 140/90 mark, and the doctor basically tells me that I am going to get induced tonight. It is for my safety and Zelda’s. I don’t have preeclampsia like I was diagnosed with at the end of my pregnancy with Kalliszta, but I have gestational hyper-tension. Not great but not as bad (or so I tell myself). She tells me to go home, pack up, get ready, and come back in the evening, and that she will tell Triage to be expecting me.

On Tuesday I was mentally ready to be induced, but today I was not. I call Bill crying while I ate lunch – a very expensive but delicious soup and chocolate covered blueberries from my favorite food spot in the lobby of the building called Beatrix. Bill is able to calm me down and convince me that this is a good thing, and I drive home. We get our go bags again, take a shower, eat food and tell Kalliszta that this time we really are going to bring her new baby home and that she will be able to hug and kiss her new baby soon. She even tells us that she will hug and kiss the new baby, which melts my heart. She had stepped on something earlier in the morning and was walking funny – she wasn’t putting her heal down and wasn’t putting weight on it – and it worried me. I didn’t want to leave her if she was in pain. Luckily though, by the time Bill and I left, she was ok.

4pm Thursday, September 30th

Bill and I leave the suburbs and head to the hospital. Triage was much busier tonight than on Tuesday. We checked in at 5:15pm and waited in the Triage lobby until 7:25pm when they finally brought us back. I take everything off and change into the hospital gown, and Bill made me laugh with his comment about my pantyliner: “well that wont be enough!” referring to just how much blood and other discharge is in our future. I get my IV put in, and while it only took one try this time (as opposed to three tries and two nurses last time), it still hurts like a mother when it’s happening. After contractions, getting the IV in is the most painful part of childbirth. The Triage rooms are small and the beds are not meant for sitting on/laying on for hours. They get very uncomfortable after a while – the mattress pad where your butt sits was basically non-existent from overuse, and I felt like I was sitting on a piece of wood. I couldn’t really lay flat because of the monitors on my belly, but I also couldn’t sit up fully for the same reason. But I guess even that narrow uncomfortable bed was better than the side chair Bill had to sit on. Can you believe we were in this room 8 hours! Basically it was a holding room – I guess a lot of people were having babies that day.

11:15pm Thursday, September 30th

For the past few hours Bill and I were talking about getting dinner. We kept thinking we would move to a room in Labor and Delivery soon, but the hours kept ticking away. We buzz the nurse and ask if I am allowed to eat, and what’s good around here. Bill and I decided on Panera, and it was super delicious. I have a great poop while in Triage (my second one there) and then we both try to sleep as this will be our last night without a newborn. But no real sleep was had given the uncomfortable arrangements of the room. My BPs the whole time in Triage were in the 130s and high 70s, but the plan was to get induced anyway, despite these numbers being below the threshold of worrisome. Bill makes an observation about how this room was obviously designed for women because the toilet seat doesn’t even stay up in the bathroom!

3:20am Friday, October 1st

FINALLY! A nurse comes to our room with a wheelchair and good news: a room is ready for us in Labor and Delivery on the 8th floor! We get the best room because of the view, but since it’s the middle of the night, we don’t know this yet. We get settled in, and Bill changes into sweatpants (yes, we all have to get comfy) and a button down shirt. I love him so much, he is so thoughtful because I didn’t even think of that. He wore his button down shirt so he can do skin to skin time with Zelda once they arrive. He also packed things that I really liked having the first time around, specifically blankets for us and a big plastic cup for water with a big wide straw and a handle. When you can’t move much because of monitors and weird positions, having a straw makes a huge difference.

5:15am Friday, October 1st

It’s time to check my cervix to see how far dilated I am. And I am at 3cm, which is a good start. Zelda’s head is down, so we are good to go ahead and start inducing me! First step, put the Foley balloon in. I chat with the nurses about pain meds now, and think back to last time when the pain started and decide to hold off. The only part of this birth plan I was adamant about was to get an epidural before having my water broken. I should have done it before the balloon though! It isn’t painful to put in, just a lot of discomfort and pressure and some cramping. The balloon is long and narrow, and once in place, it is filled with water to expand. Soon after it is in at 5:30am, I start having very painful cramps, and was feeling these contractions in my lower back and stomach where I think my ovaries are. This was like a 7 out of 10 pain. My BPs are now in the 140s and high 80s. And now Bill was taking a nap and I really didn’t want him to wake up because at least one of the two of us needed to be well rested for when we have an infant to take care of! The doctor said it would take about 4 hours for the balloon to work and would check on me only later.

6:40am Friday, October 1st

I buzz the nurse, or she came in, and tell her I am in a lot of pain from the contractions, and if we can check on the balloon. Turns out, the balloon did it’s job in only an hour and was ready to come out. Thank goodness. Once it is out, I feel an immediate sense of relief and the contraction pain is gone. I let the care team know I am ready for the epidural now before we do any other interventions. We had to wake Bill up because he had to stand on the other side of the bed so he can’t see the epidural being put in. I purposely asked the anesthesiologist to please not let me see the needle, and she said she never lets her patients see it. I don’t even want to google image it, because I won’t be able to unsee it. All I know is that it is BIG. I was very nervous for the epidural, don’t know why because I had it done before, but during the whole quick procedure, my BPs shot way up. The bottom number was in the 100s! The nurse was confident we could disregard those numbers because of the stress I was going through at that moment.

10:40am Friday, October 1st

Time passes, I get a catheter in, we hang out, sleep, and then Dr. Armstrong comes to break my water because my cervix is at 5cm dilated. She will be the one to deliver Zelda, but she’ll get stuck in the OR when the time comes so Dr. Nosal steps in when it’s time. I really liked her, but I am jumping ahead. Bill brings me some popsicles so I can do a taste test. Cherry is the best, followed by orange then grape.

1:10pm Friday, October 1st

It’s time for another cervix check. A second year resident named Connie does the exam, and she gasps, looks up at the nurse who was at the computer doing monitoring stuff and says “Call the head nurse. I feel a hand.” In a matter of 2 to 5 seconds, the room went from 2 people (other than me and Bill) to 12. Apparently, it isn’t good if your baby is trying to high-five from within. Zelda’s hand was above their head in front, a position not safe for birth. One of the many people who came running into the room was the head nurse on the floor named Nikki. I met Nikki once before when I went with my sister-in-law to hang out with some of her friends outside one of their garages. There was a small group of 5 of us, and it was a lovely socially distant mom hangout soon after we moved here from California. When conversation turned to my pregnancy and hospital of choice, Nikki told me she’s a nurse in Labor and Delivery at Northwestern. I secretly hoped she would be there on the day I was delivering because I thought she was really cool, and I want to be her friend. And now we got to hang out again while my baby’s hand was hanging out of my vagina! We chit-chatted a bit while the fourth year resident tried to push Zelda’s hand back down. Nikki tells me we may have to have a C-Section ASAP. I saw how worried Bill looked, from the news of the potential procedure and just the sea of doctors that rushed into the room, so I felt like I had to stay calm. Also, I was trying to look super cool in front of a hopefully future friend Nikki. But moments later, the fourth year resident said she was able to push Zelda’s hand down and we are out of the danger zone and back on track in a good position. She was like, “that never happens!” I felt lucky. And the room cleared just as fast as filled. Phew.

2:25pm Friday, October 1st

Zelda was not super happy with the amount of Pitocin I was getting so it got turned off. I don’t remember when we started the Pitocin drip in my IV, but it was probably after my water breaking. We know Zelda didn’t like it because of the heart rate monitor. I kept trying all sorts of different positions to get Zelda comfortable, even if it meant I was very uncomfortable.

4:05pm Friday, October 1st

It is time to start pushing! My two young nurses, Kate and Emma, were very funny and made a good team and provided good entertainment. They were also convinced that Zelda was going to be a girl. Around 4:30 I got super nauseous but didn’t throw up. I should have pushed the epidural button sooner – the button that releases more medicine – since it takes about 15 minutes to kick in. I should have just pushed it all the time because there is no way to overdose since there is a a max amount it would release no matter how many times you push the button. Also, two times during pushing I pooped! I didn’t think there was any poop in me, but I guess there was! It was just two little balls of poop, that the nurse tried to discretely wipe away, but I saw it both times and called it out. I saw because I had requested to use the mirror, which was really helpful for me last time. I could see my muscles contracting as I pushed, and I could see Zelda coming lower and lower.

6:09pm Friday, October 1st

12 hours after arriving to triage – half the time it took with Kalliszta – we have an announcement: It’s a boy! 6 pounds 9 ounces! (6:09pm at 6lbs 9oz I love that!) Bence made his entry into the world, and I got to see it happen in the mirror! Dr. Nosal was awesome because once she came into the room my pushing got better with her very clear direction. Each push is 3 consecutive 10 seconds of pushing while blowing air out, but on my last push both Dr. Nosal and I knew this was it, and she said one more 5 second push, and then one more 3 second push, and then there he was! He was so cute and sweet and got to lay on my chest and snuggle right away, where he stayed for maybe an hour. I cried when they put him on me. And Dr. Nosal showed me all the good stuff that came out with him – his placenta (it was huge!) and umbilical cord, and whatever else. It was cool to see. About an hour into his life, Bence ate a tiny bit, and then got to snuggle with his dad. I think it was during this time that we decide on his name and texted our family the happy news. Bence is said in English like the word “fence” or common “sense” but with a B!

8:00am Friday, October 1st

Bence, me, and Bill are moved to Postpartum and eat some delicious Nando’s Chicken.

10:30pm Friday, October 1st

Bence eats again. More checkups for him and me.

3:40am Saturday, October 2nd

I have a big poop (thanks to the help of stool softeners and peri bottles) and my BP is down to 116/72. More checkups. It is impossible to really sleep.

9am Saturday, October 2nd

Bence gets some bloodwork done. He doesn’t have jaundice, hooray! But he is diagnosed with a small tounge tie. This is obvious to me because he has a painful latch when I breastfeed him, partly due to that and his recessed chin. Hopefully as he gets bigger, that chin will become less recessed.

11:20am Saturday, October 2nd

Bence passes the hearing test!

3:30pm Sunday, October 3rd

A lot that I don’t remember happened between Saturday and Sunday afternoon, mostly eating and sleeping for all 3 of us. The nurses give Bence a bath at some point in the evening, and I let them take him to the nursery overnight so that I can get a couple of hours in a row of sleep. I do but it isn’t great sleep. My blood pressures also started going back up, but my uterus was going back down and I was having normal healthy amounts of bleeding. Bill thinks uterus checks are so funny. Basically, it is the nurse trying to touch my spine through my stomach in one very fast motion, kind of like being punched in the stomach. Sunday morning we were waiting around for someone (maybe a lactation consultant or pediatrician) who happened to go home sick and we didn’t know that so we could have been discharged much earlier instead of waiting around. By this time, Bill and I really wanted to go home. It seems like discharge always takes so long. It took a long time at UCSF too. Overall, I will say that UCSF was a better experience for a few reasons. Maybe because it was my first pregnancy and I had preeclampsia, the docs and nurses really explained a lot of what was going on. Or maybe I just had more questions. UCSF also sends people home with a lot more stuff that’s needed for recovery at home. So much so that I had leftovers of stuff. And the UCSF facility is newer so it feels shinier with more state of the art equipment, even the non-medical stuff was top notch, like TVs having Netflix. However, I am happy with my choice of Northwestern for Bence to be born in. Eventually, finally though, we were able to leave the hospital to go home so that Bence could meet Kalliszta and his grandparents. That was about a month ago now as I write this, but it feels like so so long ago.

4:23pm Sunday, October 3rd

Kalliszta and Bence meet for the first time, and I think it was love at first sight. Kalliszta wanted to hug Bence right away.

The past 1 month

Kalliszta is a great big sister. I was worried that she would like him at first and then tell us that she doesn’t want a new baby anymore, but that hasn’t happened (yet). She is very empathetic and cries when he cries and says “sad”. She helps out and likes to help feed him by holding the bottle. She sometimes cries because she wants milk too, but she can’t have too much or else she’ll have poops that hurt. She gets jealous when her Daddy is holding or feeding Bence, but he is so good at engaging with her and playing with her and making her feel special while holding a newborn. Some might call it infuriating how easy he makes it look. Like one day, my mom and I went to Target and Bill was at home with the two kids. We came home to find that he had cooked us all lunch AND had taken a shower. I would be able to accomplish neither of those things if I were alone with both of them. I think it’s because it is hard for me to carry both of them at the same time. Bill is taking 6 of his 16 weeks of parental leave now, and the remaining 10 later on. We’ll see how I do once he is back at work and my mom goes back to New York. Luckily, Bill works from home, and my parents will be moving to Illinois soon, so I won’t truly be alone. Even with all the hands taking care of these two wonderful kids, we are all sleep deprived. No stretch of sleep is really longer than 3 or 4 hours (except for Kalliszta), and that’s rough. But recovery in general for me was much faster this time around, I stopped bleeding after 2 weeks! But my blood pressure during those first two weeks postpartum were still very elevated. I had to go back for a checkup, but was basically told to monitor myself and to come back if I have certain symptoms. Then, 3 days after we brought Bence home, Bill and Kalliszta were driving home from music class when a lady ran a red light, and our minivan got totaled. Luckily, it was just the front of the car that got smashed, and Kalliszta and Bill were both fine. The airbags left some bruises and scrapes on Bill, but Kalliszta did not suffer physically nor emotionally, except the loud honking of the car after the accident made her cry. Other than this being scary for the grown-ups and bad for my blood pressure readings, the real headache came later trying to find a new minivan and dealing with insurance. The parts and labor shortage caused by the global pandemic made minivans few and far between. Ordering one didn’t guarantee we’d get it before the end of the year. And the first rental car provided by insurance was a Chrysler Pacifica, and there were things about it we liked more than our now totaled Honda Odyssey. Long story short, Bill actually found a 2021 Pacifica Hybrid that had everything we were looking for and more, but it was 100 miles away. The dealership delivered the car for free, and it is a huge relief and weight off to finally have a minivan again. We sure have been busy around here, because in addition to having a newborn and buying a new car, we are also planning a 2 year old’s birthday bash and building a house. Both those life events are worthy of their own blog post, so you all have some reading to look forward to! Til then, stay well and get vaccinated!